Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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