we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Randomize
