No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
