Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
