is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
The uberlube is also flammable
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize