I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
