I just saw a hot homeless man
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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