We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize