Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
