Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
