don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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