just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
