cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize