She's JV to your varsity
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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