i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
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She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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