Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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