just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
