ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
