I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
