Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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