So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
