We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
