chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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