The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
