just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
