Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
