you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
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I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
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We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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