Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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