I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
