If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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