TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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