reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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