So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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