if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
meet me or not, i'm out of control
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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