She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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