Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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