...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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