drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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