he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
