He had one of those small greek statue penises
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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