Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
no you cant smoke seaweed
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
