He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
