and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Randomize
