I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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