Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
