I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I need a beard to bite.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
