So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
