So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize