sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize
