He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
