I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize