I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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