literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize